Moments of Kindness

It was a few months ago, I was in the Costco food court line and the individual in front of me said, "Do you want my drinks? We aren't going to use them." A simple gesture of kindness. Passing on to someone else something they may need and you don't. My oldest son looked at me afterwards and said, "that was nice." A moment in time. An individual doing something not in self-interest, not necessary, but taking a few seconds of that person's time to try to brighten another's day.

We are about to enter the winter shopping season. I've actually appreciated not seeing internet videos of freaked out Black Friday shoppers raging against the lines. I've enjoyed the Facebook posts of people sharing moments at the parade rather than great shopping finds they have discovered online. I've liked the pictures of those choosing to #optoutside on Black Friday and take hikes with their kids or fish in a lake. I am sure the angry shopper videos will come, the great deals will be shared, and the shopping adventures will occur. However, I think perhaps as a society we are discovering that taking the moments to spend the time with each other throughout the silly season and the year are of at least equal importance to the discoveries we make to show our appreciation of each other.

Being kind is something children learn from all of us. It may be an individual holding a door for a stranger, someone offering to take their empty shopping cart to the cart return, or paying for the next person's drink at the coffee drive-through line. Kindness is an activity we can teach anyone by simply doing it in our own life. We show our own kids this when we take time to listen to a clerk's story regarding their favorite Thanksgiving stuffing or giving up our place in line to someone with 4 young kids dying to get their McNuggets. Kindness is learned and can come from the most odd and unique places.

Kindness is based on an awareness of others. A willingness to give up just a little bit of yourself in terms of time, energy, attention, money, or items to make someone else's day a little brighter. We teach our children this by simply doing this within our lives while they are present. It's easy to do if we are doing it anyways. We teach other people's children it also by simply doing it in their presence. Easy enough if we are doing it anyways. Sooner than you know it, you'll see your children doing it to. So this summer I learned a new habit to. I pass on my soda cups at Costco when we aren't using them also. A big thanks to the mysterious stranger who taught me a simple act of kindness.

Kindness can come from the smallest places

Our Fears and Learning to Be Brave

In schools, we learn how to succeed. We learn to take little steps, complete things, identify the directions, create manageable goals, and work together to win. We talk about "Fail" as the "first attempt in learning." As a professional community, educators have learned to focus deeply on social-emotional learning. Yet in all of this, one aspect we rarely touch on in school is fear and the anxiety it produces.

Hollywood has focused on this forever. They have given us mortals who have confronted the supernatural such as Geena Davis in "The Fly." They have given us young Jedi preparing to confront great evils. Even monsters afraid of young children. While the big screen has capitalized on the theme of confronting one's fears, how much preparation and training have we done for our adults and our children.

In 1949, George Orwell wrote about a society which was always told to be afraid of the people and leaders of other societies. In the 60's, 70's, 80's we learned to fear the Evil Empire.  These were big untouchable fears. But real fears grew closer to home. Maybe it was being afraid of bees, poison ivy, dogs, failing, losing a job, or losing a loved one. Each individual has fears and how often have we as a society worked to give our children and our adults the tools.

As a parent, and a young adult, I have begun to realize how real fears are. Whether in working with new dads anticipating their first baby, adults who've lost loved ones, young men and women who have lost their first job, it dawns on me that these fears are real. The lack of control is real. The feeling of helplessness is real. How do we give each of us, adults and children, the skills and capacities to address these situations, challenges they feel they can't control, and provide the ability to move forward.

This need became obvious to me on Wednesday night. The unbelievable had happened. First, it was the Cubs in the World Series. Something I had never seen. Something my father, my aunt, and my uncle had never seen. There were moments that felt so Cub. Falling down 3 games to 1. Facing a former Cy Young winner in the final game. Giving up two runs on a wild pitch in the 5th. There we were, generations connected from Scottsdale to Scotland, Madison to Chicago to Ann Arbor, from the oldest grandparent to the youngest infant. Anticipating, fearing, dreading, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

My dad couldn't watch until the final out. I listened in my bedroom to Pat and Ron on the call, as Aroldis Chapman gave up the home run to Rajai Davis, assuredly surrendering the lead. We didn't have the courage to watch. Too ingrained the annual fears of failure. The memories of generation failures upon us. My brother, my cousins, they were there like Cub fans across the world anxiously awaiting an outcome they couldn't control. 

I think of the learnings we can teach. I think of a kindergarten classroom in our district, where on the wall there is a simple phrase, "Be Brave." I think of how unusual it is that we address this and how powerful the tools are that are being taught in this room. A phrase and a focus that needs to spread. For if we raise children, not to not have fears, but rather how to be brave, then in those uncontrollable moments, we might not feel the collective anxiety and react rashly but rather with that bazillion dollar smile as Kris Bryant approached that final out, grabbing the ball and ending the burden of Cubs fandom.

We must learn how all of us can "be brave."

The Out

Symbol of Hope

One of my roles at work is to work with students who have been identified as "Limited English Proficient," their teachers, and their families. These children are often the children or grandchildren of immigrants. Like my great-grandparents, their families came to this country from wherever they had lived before filled with dreams, desire, a strong work ethic, and a willingness to make it as a family. For each family, it's not easy. They come from a variety of linguistic and cultural backgrounds. They have native languages in Gujarati, Malayalam, Serbian, Spanish, Tamil, and others. Many work two shifts to make ends meet. Sometimes the children understand why their parents or grandparents made this journey and sometimes they don't. In the end, the children and their families simply want to be welcomed, make friends, and lead good lives. As I work with the teachers that support these students and their families, they share stories of the worry and anxiety that this election cycle has had. The vast majority of our families are legal immigrants, however, the broad brushes of politics have stirred feelings that have made these students and families feel unwelcome.

I live in Chicago and for most of a century, the Chicago Cubs have been pretty dreadful. We tell stories of 1969 when a team filled with Hall of Famers, Willams, Jenkins, and Santo, fell out of contention. We remember the ball going through Leon Durhams legs in the '84 playoffs. We share stories of Steve Bartman, a fan who was blamed for the collapse of the '03 Cubs by manager Dusty Baker, and rarely talk about about moments prior shortstop Alex Gonzales error that led to the collapse. Through all of this, Cub fans have been extremely resilient. From the Die-Hards like of previous generations like my Grandfather Rudy, Uncle Al, and Aunt Bea, to the friends that have consistently crowded the bleachers whether they were winning 70 or 90. For Cubs fans, even in the darkest of times, there has always been hope.

This month, my television has turned into a nationwide version of the Jerry Springer show. Debates and political campaigns, regardless of your political ideology, have become more spectacle than policy discussion. Growing up, political dialogue I would expect to see on the MacNeil/Lehrer Newshour or hear from Milton Friedman, now has references from Wikileaks and Access Hollywood.   Like the historic observer of the Cubs, regardless of the side of the aisle you sit, it can feel like we have reached a point where there is no hope. Our families with Limited English Proficient students certainly feel this way. In Field of Dreams, Terrence Mann (James Earl Jones) reminds Ray Kinsella (Kevin Costner) through the seas of change that have swept our country, one constant remains, Baseball. This is no truer than now. While we watch one of the ugliest elections of our time, the Chicago Cubs seem to have risen from the ashes. With the best infield since Tinkers to Evers to Chance, America is being swept from a northside ray of hope. With a hashtag #nomorenextyears the lovable Cubs are providing some positive all of us need.

In times of darkness, each of us needs a symbol. A reminder of what is good in this world and the difference each of us can make. A silly positive moment, to remind us of what can be, to see the good, and believe in each other. As we work with students and their families that feel the negative swings whether from their own lives or from a national dialogue, sharing symbols of hope and a positive future. Helping them find ways where they, or more appropriately we, can make a difference. That is the guidance all of us need.

Symbol of Hope

The Way We Learn

I was in a first grade class the other day. Children were asked to read independently. Some chose to pick up a book. Others chose to open an app on their iPad. Two individuals, a boy and a girl, walked up to the teacher independently at different times and asked if they could use Brainpop. My first reaction as an observer was that watching videos isn't reading. And, it isn't. However, the experience stuck with me. I've dwelled on it for the last 15 or so hours. Maybe there is more to this.

I have two children. One is a vociferous reader. Hand him a book and two hours later he is done with it. He is constantly reading text, whether in print, on the screen, or on the back of a cereal box. He tends to prefer stories, often towards leaning towards technology such as science fiction. At times he enjoys humorous fantasy or comic strips. My other child is a utilitarian reader. He reads because he has to or because he wants a specific piece of information. He is my non-fiction child. His reading is often how to do something or how something works.

When I needed to figure out how to add freon to my wife's minivan, I read the directions and that only got me so far. When I clicked over to youtube and watched some homemade videos, instantly I understood. I even had the video replay as I did it.

For both of them, and many of their friends, they learn more often through video. My utilitarian learner is constantly watching how to videos. He wants to know why something works or how he can modify something into something else. His video stream reminds me of the scenes from A-Team or MacGuyver, when they build something to solve the problem. However, instead of the montage, he is taking in the step by step analysis of how to do it. My vociferous reader seeks out videos that are either how to get through a video game level, political humor, or SpongeBob.

While we would project my vociferous reader as the one most likely to learn more because he reads more, I think my utilitarian reader is working to learn more often. In our heads, because we grew up in a text-driven society, access to print opened and closed doors. However, if a picture is worth a thousand words, how much value is there in a video? My utilitarian learner has skills at age 9 that I could only dream of. He is the curious one, wondering deeply about how the world works.

I am not sure which child will be better off. I hope for the best for both of them. Either way, I think the way we learn maybe changing. Text may not be the gatekeeper to knowledge anymore. Like those first graders, perhaps some of the time we may access learning more efficiently by clicking the video and checking out Brainpop.

Learning to Dance

I Don't Think That Word Means What You Think It Means

I taught high school in the mid-Nineties. As with all schools, there was one teacher who expounded on how challenging her class was. She frequently mentioned that she had high expectations for her students and that most often she was disappointed by the children of this school. When talking with one of my administrator friends, he explained to me, this talk was simply code for the fact that 60-70% of her students got a "D" or "F" in her class. The administrator saw this as a problem. He explained to a young wet behind the ears (from swim practice) intern that our role was to help students learn the concepts. If many students weren't passing it was on us. Either we needed to be better in facilitating learning, our measurement had bad questions or a bad scale, or we needed a new measurement.

Recently, I have heard the word rigorous used when describing why students are doing poorly on a measure. The most recent incident was when two speakers at a conference I attended explained that the reason students were now doing more poorly on a new assessment of standards than previous assessments of the same standards is that the test was more rigorous. Perhaps Vizzini might call this "inconceivable." Lets look at the situation:
                              Same population being assessed, check.
                              Same standards, check.
                              New Assessment, check.
                              New Scoring Rubric, check.
One may look at the situation and ask, perhaps "rigorous" doesn't mean what you think it means. Perhaps we have a bad scale designed only to pass a few students. Perhaps we have some bad questions that only a few kids can get. Or perhaps, we have a bad assessment overall.

We are finding that more "rigorous" often is test maker jargon for not many kids are going to get this. I was a swimmer. Swimming the 200 fly was more rigorous than swimming the 50 fly. No matter how slow you tried to go, there was no way around it, you were more exhausted after 200 fly than 50 fly. Doing a Tough Mudder is more rigorous thank doing the mile run. Failing a lot of students on an assessment isn't about more rigor, rigor comes through the experience, it's about trying to set the bar so people will fail, just like the teacher who was "challenging" or having "high expectations." Code words are code words and we need to recognize the situation. The more I think about it, the more I find these actions "inconceivable."

The Days Before Television

The sun rose as I pulled into Caruso Middle School parking lot on Friday morning to drop my eldest at Cross Country practice. Mrs. Spies warmly greeted her 30 to 40 students and their requisite drivers as she welcomed them in for their morning run. Across the screen of my phone came a group text from our friend's daughter celebrating to with my sons, my wife, her sister, and her mom, "and just like that, it's my Bar Mitzvah weekend." What followed was congratulations from the adults and memes (funny videos and pictures) that she and the children were making instantaneously to celebrate the event. Yes, I said making. As adults mostly we share them, but children, they often create them. Here were shouts of joy from a child becoming religiously a woman, and due to her family dynamics and the tools in her hand she had the capacity to share them with the world.

The other day, I took my son and his friend out kayaking. They had met at camp and it seemed like a terrific adventure. They children brought their phones with them, in nice waterproof cases, and I brought the dog. There was great fun as they tried to tandem paddle down the river. Occasional tossing of algae at each other. Occasions when paddles collided. With their phones draped around their neck, they took the occasional picture. As we pulled past the river into a lake portion of the journey, my son's friend asks Siri to FaceTime her father. Simply, she wanted to share the view and moment with her dad. While she was having a blast with her friend, that moment, that time, just like that she was able to bring her dad into an event, talk with him, show him, share, and then return to tossing algae.

From time to time I see articles shared about how children's devices and screens are the problem. I remember my uncle raving about the "idiot box" television as he listened to the dronings on of the radio. I think it's easy for each generation to cast stones at what the youth of the day are doing. I think it's harder to boil it down to the essential values of what is driving youth to make those choices and understand how the children are doing that. Gary Larsen once drew for his Far Side comic strip, the following:

A satirical commentary that families once did something when they were bored that wasted time and that during the seventies and eighties, families chose television. When my children are bored, they sometimes watch screens. From my perspective dreadfully boring expository dialogues walking them through Minecraft, Pokemon, and the best Nerf guns (don't ask why, I don't get it either). When my children are bored, they also create movies. Filming themselves making silly songs, dancing, reenacting scenes, and making their own scenes. Most importantly, when I provide my children with an experience such as kayaking, seeing a cave, walking through a museum, they are there too. Often sharing the moments with their friends, our family, and with each other both orally and digitally.

Youth has always wanted their voice to be heard for her they are. In the 50's and 60's it was ham radios. In the 70's it was the high school and camp radio stations. In the 80's films such as Pump Up the Volume and Breakfast Club, the cartoon Jem and the Holograms celebrated this theme. In the 2000's with Raise Your Voice is one example of the continued theme. And now on the Internet all across youtube, youth creating their channels and sharing their stories. The theme is we want to interact and share our perspective of the world. The tools of today are our phones, our tablets, and our Chromebooks. Yes, we can long for times when kids played stickball in the street and spent time tossing rocks across the pond. We can also see our kids for who they are and create opportunities for them to embrace their world and maximize who they can be.

Sharing Our Story

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The Records Room

Growing up, my mother was one of the local community doctors. Back before corporate run large medical groups, she was in solo practice. Hanging her proverbial shingle outside her office. She ran the business. At first it was a couple of employees and as the business grew, the obligations and support team grew also. During the eighties, the availability of technology changed and as a result, the skills necessary to lead the office and the tools within the office changed also.

One of our first roles of helping out mom at the office was filing records. The had rows and rows of cabinets with patient records. When we were in on the weekend, it was our job to meticulously file them alphabetically in order so that the receptionist, nurse, or my mom could get to them quickly. There were never a lot to file, but usually 15 or 20 that hadn't gotten done by the close of the day on Friday. However, when we would walk into the records room, we were literally surrounded by files. All painstakingly organized for quick access.

I walked into my son's doctors office now. Its a small practice, four doctors. The receptionist is in an open air area with windows behind her. It's a nice view. There are no files. She uses an earpiece to talk to individuals on the phone. In a moment's notice she has all of the information on my son. She sends a digital alert to the doctor to let us know we picked up his prescriptions.

The change from the records room to now didn't happen overnight. There were many that said it wasn't necessary, there would be fewer jobs for people, and it wouldn't improve health care. Many professionals needed additional time, support, and training to make the transition. However, as we complete the journey, we can certainly say that our medical professionals have greater access to up to date information to provide the best care they can.

Thirty years later, we are making the same transition in education. Sure we did it long ago with student records. However, teachers, administrators, and secretaries make up only a small portion of those who work in schools. Students are by far the largest number of workers in a school. The digital transition to student devices is more than simply screen time and glowing parchment. The impacts are more than access to Khan Academy videos and digital games. The impacts begin with simple work flow. If emailing out a page for students saves 10 minutes at the copier (figure walking to the copier, running the copy, and walking back, all assuming that the copier works and their is no line), and 3 minutes of passing out papers, that number alone adds up to incredible savings throughout the school year of teacher time and student time. If digital distribution, means that now I can distribute different worksheets to different groups, not only is time saved but now we can get more aligned products. If digital distribution means that students can send me back their work electronically instead of putting it in a bin, needing to ensure that every paper has made it to the bin and has a name on it (ask a teacher, this is a real problem), and I need to sort it and organize it, there alone is a tremendous time savings. If digital distribution means that I have access to teacher and student materials beyond the age level I teach, there is an incredible time savings and learning opportunity. None of these huge savings addresses the incredible product development opportunities for students and teachers, authentic publishing experiences, or research opportunities available to children and adults. The digital revolution is as much about creating time and learning efficiencies as anything else.

The integration of 1:1 learning won't be easy. It may not be inexpensive. However, the new-fangled ultrasound machine that my mom got for her office wasn't either. Like my mom, we will need to be brave as we change the tools of our practice. In the end, these tools improved patient care, just as 1:1 will improve learning. They allowed more specific and more diagnostic care, just as 1:1 will help in learning.

Checking the Records Room